Yuk...two really shit days spent pining for the invisible woman. I was climbing the walls last night. Thankfully I have friends who'll come to my aid, and it's a good distraction but like the cartoon (right) says, closure is probably going to be something I will have to find for myself.That said, I still haven't figured out a way to get around the fact that I don't know whether she was ever 'for real' or not. Normally in such conditions I'd take things into my own hands, force the issue, tackle it head-on but I can't in this case.
Perhaps that's it - the lack of autonomy. The fact that I am genuinely powerless to do anything. It certainly annoys me - the huge amount of time I spend thinking about her. In fact, I'm having difficulty thinking about anything else right now.
Anyway, it's been sunny for two days so I'm gonna go exert some rage on the trails. Knowing my luck, this will all have been a cognitive distortion, and on my way back through the Beaches I'll end up running her seven year-old daughter over by accident. She'll be fine, my bike will be wrecked, and it'll take me two hours to walk home with it slung over my shoulder.
How the f**k do I manage it? I sure do pick 'em.
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